How to Meditate: A Step by Step Guide for Beginners
Have you ever wanted to learn how to meditate?
It feels like it’s all the rage right now. From celebrities to your next door neighbor, it seems like everyone is meditating.
But how do you get started? And why is meditation even important? What’s the big deal?
There’s so much information out there, it can feel overwhelming. And I know from experience, meditation can be frustrating for a beginner.
Maybe you’re looking for a way to reduce anxiety, or just want some time to yourself during the day. You might not know where to start or what meditation is even about. Don’t worry! We’ve got your back with this step by step guide to meditation.
Getting Started
There are many different types of meditation. Mantra meditation, Transcendental Meditation, mindfulness meditation, Vipassana Meditation, Metta Meditation and Zen Meditation are some common examples you might have heard of.
But for a beginner, getting started is the important part. The style or form of meditation you choose doesn’t matter as much. At its core, most meditation is about noticing your thoughts and being aware of the present. So don’t get too bogged down in the details of whether you’re doing it “correctly”. For the purposes of this guide, we’ll focus on a fairly standard “mindfulness” or Vipassana style, but as you practice more and get more comfortable, you’ll find a routine that works for you.
Find a Quiet Place
You want to find a quiet place where you can sit or lie down comfortably. Ideally, you should be able to easily relax without feeling like someone is watching over your shoulder. Contrary to popular belief, one does not need absolute silence to meditate. Background noise can even be a helpful anchor for your practice. Sure, in an ideal world we would all have a beautiful, peaceful sanctuary to escape to, but that’s not always feasible. So just do the best you can. And if you need to use earplugs or noise cancelling headphones, do so!
Take a Comfortable Position
Once you have found a quiet place, it’s time to choose how you want to sit. There are many different ways to meditate and the best one is the one that works for you. You probably have the image in your mind of a blissful monk sitting cross legged on a meditation cushion on top of a mountain. But most people actually have hips and knees and backs, and sitting cross legged on the floor for any stretch of time is not really tenable.
The most important thing is to be comfortable and relaxed, but alert. Whether that’s sitting on the floor, sitting on a chair, lying down, or standing up, it’s useful to find a position that you can hold for the duration of your meditation without feeling too much discomfort or pain.
I typically sit in a chair when I practice. I find that I can stay more alert when I’m sitting up straight as opposed to lying down. And for me, sitting on the floor is really not an option for any significant stretch of time.
Notice Your Body
Now that you’ve found a comfortable posture, the next step is to start noticing your body. You might close your eyes, or keep them loosely open. Whichever feels best to you.
Do you notice any physical sensations? Perhaps your body feels tired or heavy, perhaps it’s tingling with energy. Scan through the different parts of your body and notice how they feel right now. Is anything feeling uncomfortable? Maybe there’s tightness in your knees, hips, or back. Maybe you have an itch on your nose. Maybe you feel some tightness or anxiety in your chest.
Whatever it is, the point is not to try and change it. The point is to notice, to be aware of each sensation. If you need to shift positions to get more comfortable, feel free. There’s no pride or benefit to sitting through pain.
Find the Breath
After scanning your body and noticing the physical space you exist in, the next step is to focus on your breathing. No matter what form of meditation you’re practicing, the breath is a good place to start as an anchor for your session.
Notice how the air feels as it comes in through your nose, how cool it is on your nasal passages as it passes over them, and how warm it feels once it reaches the back of your throat. Notice how each breath makes your chest or belly rise and fall. You can place one hand on your stomach to feel this more clearly if it feels good.
You can notice how your body feels as you breathe. If tension is present, where do you feel it? What does it feel like?
If you’ve ever done yoga, you’re probably familiar with yoga breathing techniques. Focusing on your breath during meditation is similar.
Get Distracted…and Return to Center
This is the heart of meditation.
As your focusing on your breath, or scanning your body, you’ll encounter distraction. Inevitably, your mind will wander.
In my mind, it usually goes something like this…
Deep breath in through the nose, deep breath out through the mouth.
Deep breath in…wait, what’s for dinner tonight? Should we order takeout? Do we still have pasta in the fridge? Maybe we should just eat that? Oh shoot, I really need to take the care in today, that dent is still in the rear panel…
Damn! I’m distracted. Okay, okay, deep breath in…
And repeat.
Distraction is the Practice
It’s easy to feel frustrated when we get distracted. But understand, that is the practice. We get distracted, and hopefully, eventually, we notice it. And we return to the breath (or whatever our anchor is for that session).
Over and over again. That’s meditating. Exciting, right?
But over time, you might notice the moments of distraction are shorter, and maybe even fewer and farther between. We can develop the ability to come back to center more quickly. And there in lies the beauty of meditation.
Listen to the Ambience Around You
In addition to the breath, listening to your surroundings can be another helpful meditation anchor, especially for beginners.
Listen to the sounds around you. If there are none (lucky you), notice the silence.
Notice the sound of a car honking, or footsteps from your upstairs neighbor, or the birds chirp chirping. Then notice the silence between sounds.
Just like with the breath, you’ll surely get distracted. It’s okay, just come back to listening. This is why I say background noise can actually be helpful. When we embrace it, when we stop fighting it, noise can be woven into your practice just like the breath, or a mantra, or any other anchor.
I personally find it challenging to let go. When I find those moments of blissful silence, I want to hold on. I want to sit in them and make them last longer. But letting go is an important part of meditating. Allow one moment to flow into the next, allow silence to flow into sound. Just notice.
Return to Your Surroundings
In my experience, it’s helpful to set a timer, or have some form of defined end to your practice. When the timer sounds, try to slowly open your eyes (or focus your gaze if your eyes have been open). Instead of just jumping back into your day, try to take a minute or two to acclimatize to your surroundings. Take note of your practice. There’s no good or bad. Whether you were more distracted or less distracted than usual, you showed up, and that’s the whole point.
Whether you’re meditating for five minutes, or an hour, or even just a couple minutes, consistency is more important than duration. It’s much more helpful to meditate for five minutes every day than it is to meditate for an hour once a month. Take it slow. Being your practice with a couple minutes, or even just a couple breaths.
Just get started.